I met a pretty woman the other day. I couldn’t guess her age…45 to 55, trim, well turned out. With my usual tact I blurted out, “You’re PRETTY!” She responded gracefully, as she is in a career where she often works with small children. “Thank you!” I asked her if she always intended to hold…
My therapist has a great butthole analogy. (Ha! Anal-ogy…just noticed that. Ah…butts are fun). She uses it to help clients understand why they cling on to the bad habits in their lives. Why they stay doughy and sick, why they don’t try for a better job, why they hang around people they don’t like.…
Sian Doesn’t Care What I Think This is a link to a blog by a fat UK chick names Sian. I don’t know a lot about her, though I want to. Her language is fashion more than words. That language is pissed off, joyful, ironic, bright and dark, it just depends on her mood that…
Every parent has a few gaudy tail feathers to shake at the world regarding the brilliance of their children. LE could ride a bike a 5, cross any monkeybars with ease at six. She doesn’t lie, she bathes and dresses her brother, and always says thank you. And stuff. Shake shake shake… But there’s…
There is a meme I put on my Pinterest. Underneath I wrote “and looked what happened to them…” That means, they were overtaken by a foreign culture and their way of life was obliterated. This poster supports tighter immigration laws, even if it doesn’t mean too. A woman said I was racist toward Native Americans. Bah. If…
Listen, you can look down on me all you want. But I say, if you were in the same situation, YOU would have grabbed that Playboy out of the Burger King garbage can, same as I did. Not this one…but that’s the general idea. Maybe it was the long buried reflex all bad children…
I had forgotten there are still people who hate me because I’m fat. I knew it for a fact most of life. From about 8 to 21, when I met Gus. I knew I was fat and that any time anyone wasn’t mean to me, especially boys, I should be grateful. Fat matters less when you’re…
I’ve been gone, neither reading you or writing me. I’ve been trying to do my for-pay articles like a grownup, which means writing even when I don’t want to or when the research is tedious. (It’s surprising hard to find a picture of an Ephedra bush that is not copyrighted). And, well, that’s going…
LE went to a sleepover. Gus told me, “Don’t think about it.”He didn’t mean, control your emotions, mama bird, dry your tears. Lord no. It was his response to my tenuous observation that everything was…so much more calm and easy and nice with her away. Cripes. No constant questions, no hearing “mama?mama?mama?mama?” repeated until I get…
I called the press line at DEA headquarters in Washington DC because…ehh long story. Meth, Chinese plants, gardening. And a sweet southern lady answered, on a Sunday afternoon! Who wouldn’t talk with me! So I asked her (politely, curiously) how come she was even there.“We’re a 24 hour operation.”“But if you can’t talk to…
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