Let’s Do This Thing. At lunch today Amelia and Marlene dutifully chose salads over clam chowder. The last piece of bread sat in the basket. “Look, I’m totally eating that,” I said, and snatched it up. It was just going to sit there because most women are too polite to take the last piece of…
I am I the only who feels sad whenever I see Bettie Page? Or any of the myriad of crap that bears her likeness? I’m not sure how she became an icon for feminists reclaiming their sexual power. I guess because she’s strongly built, has a hearty smile and is usually holding a whip. But seriously, have you read about…
That’s it. I quit. Hands in the air, quit. It’s official. Everything…EVERYTHING is going to harm your child. Including swaddling them. You know, swaddling. The thing that nearly every civilization in every era of history has done for all of time? Yeah, now we need to worry about THAT, too, according to The…
LE has been taught that it’s ok to ask me questions about people. It’s ok to notice that someone is very fat, missing a leg, dressed differently, a different culture, or mentally challenged. And we can talk about it. The only rule is that she has to wait until they are gone to ask me. In…
Many women and girls have the ability to look fantastic. To really lay it on, dress to the nines. They turn heads at the Italian restaurant, they get flirted with at the wedding reception. Even I could do it every now and then. But that’s not the same as being “professional grade” pretty. Like models and…
Utter. Crap. I mean it. Have you met this person in real life? If you climb their wall, what is your reward? Do you reap the bounty of them? Do they embrace you, give you back what you’ve put into them, what you need to feel loved? Your climbing, your effort, makes them feel wanted. And…
*Andrea Zuckerman, Beverly Hills 90210 GAWD. Ok, no one was particularly likable on 90210. But they were charismatic and/or slickly attractive, in their shallow, pinched nose sorta way. But Andrea, man she just had nothing to offer. She should have been the most interesting. Poor, smart, not conventionally pretty…her character should have been hilarious or poignant or something. But no.…
I am a twisted peg, and I owe so much happiness to that. So this is my analogy. Love is a pegboard, stretching Alice-in-Wonderland style to near infinity. You are a peg, individually carved. Your shape is determined by who you are, your entirety. The sexual attractiveness of your body, your rage, your humor, your ambition, your selfishness, your wit, your…
Pee sticks. The only time, hopefully, taking a pee will change your life. Well, my pregnancies were just terrible. There was something squirming through the hormones of pregnancy that infested my brain chemistry with a deep mental sickness. The result was so horrible but so nebulous I can’t describe it so I rarely try. It’s the feeling you get when you’re alone in…
I get a little excited when I see evidence of why thin people stay that way. It’s like seeing the secret metal mechanisms that run the Presidents at that exhibit in Disneyland. I sat next to my friend Kerin in a movie theater and watched her arrange her diet coke and “light, light on the…
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